‘Autocrat’ doesn’t quite say it

Posted on June 16, 2020 by oddmanout215

We were reading from Masha Gessen’s Surviving Autocracy, a book that has appeared at exactly the right time:

If politicians, journalists, and even kitchen-table debaters adopted the habit of defining their terms, we would understand each other better — and begin the process of restoring language.

Gessen’s words brought up a pet peeve of mine regarding the mainstream media: At what point in an ongoing story should reporters and editors drop the euphemisms and start using terms that more accurately describe unsavory public figures and their actions?

“Who cares about your pet peeve?” Swamp Rabbit said.

We all should care, I told him, because the country is still reeling from some of Donald Trump’s worst abuses of power thus far, including using the U.S. military to disperse protesters in order to stage a photo op on Lafayette Square, and threatening to deploy 10,000 troops to put down protests in Washington, D.C., and other cities.

The sad fact is that most major media outlets are only now coming to terms with the role they played in enabling Trump by refusing to recognize that he was, as Gessen puts it, “probably the first major party nominee who ran not for president but for autocrat.”

“What’s she mean by autocrat?” Swamp Rabbit said. “Is that the same as dictator?”

Good question. I told him an autocrat is an all-powerful leader and so is a dictator. But the word autocrat isn’t supposed to convey the same menace as dictator. According to one online site, “An autocrat lacks the personality cult or charisma of a dictator and this probably restrains him from taking extreme decisions that could severely hurt his people.”

Swamp Rabbit was still confused. “So why does Gessen use the word autocrat? Trump has a cult following and he don’t care who he hurts. Don’t that make him a wanna-be dictator?”

Another good question. I told him that Gessen and respectable journalists everywhere prefer to avoid using explosive terms like “dictator” because such terms make them sound like their arguments are rooted in emotional bias rather than in reason. The last thing a mainstream journalist wants to be called is biased.

“That don’t make no sense,” Swamp Rabbit said. “Trump has been lying forever but it took them reporters a couple of years to call him a liar. And it took them even longer to call him a racist, even though he made a million racist remarks and spread the lie that Barack Obama was a Kenyan. Biased is beside the point if you got your facts straight.”

I heaved a big sigh. “I don’t know, rabbit. This is the first time the media had to deal with a president who is totally, unabashedly rotten — a guy who would shred the Constitution if he could — and with an entire political party that would shred it with him in order to stay on top. Autocrat fits.”

Swamp Rabbit shook his head. “Autocrat is too polite. It don’t quite say it.”

I shrugged. “You say potato, I say po-tah-toe.”

“I say lying racist wanna-be dictator. That’s Trump.”

Footnote: Surviving Autocracy is about a lot more than just Trump, but Swamp Rabbit’s point is a good one. There’s no sense in trying to make an argument if we don’t define our terms, right?

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Who do you believe, police or your lying eyes?

Posted on June 8, 2020 by oddmanout215

Swamp Rabbit wanted to know what I thought of the four Minneapolis cops who were arrested and charged in the killing of George Floyd. I told him lying with impunity used to be one of the perks of the job, but those days might be ending.

“Ain’t it the truth,” he said as we watched another video, this one of Buffalo cops. “Back in the day, cops could knock down a 75-year-old then step over him like he was a piece of trash. They’d say he tripped over his own feet and that would be that, case closed.”

We agreed that the game has changed. Thanks to phone cameras and other gadgets, peace officers can’t even poke white protesters with clubs let alone kill black people just for the hell of it.

“Two of them Buffalo cops got arrested,” Swamp Rabbit said. “Their homeys must be having second thoughts about their jobs. Why be a cop if you can’t beat up the peeps who don’t move when they see you coming?”

I told him he’s right, 57 cops have resigned from the Buffalo Police Department’s Emergency Response Team to protest what happened to their two fellow officers.

Swamp Rabbit stroked his chin whiskers and nodded. “I think that means they’re still on the force, but they don’t have to respond to no emergencies.”

“Nice work if you can get it,” I said.

Footnote: Swamp Rabbit thinks my opinion of cops is too low, there are some good ones, I’d better hope I don’t have to call them someday in an emergency. I told him I did call them once in an emergency but when they arrived, two hours later, they almost arrested me, not the bad guy, who was long gone. “There are good cops, but it’s often safer to take your chances with the bad guys,” I said.

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Would you like more curfew with your lockdown?

Posted on June 2, 2020 by oddmanout215

Philadelphians join nation wide Anti-Police brutality protest
NBCPHILADELPHIA

I was jawing with Swamp Rabbit when my phone started making those strange emergency alert noises. “Only essential personnel allowed outside,” the text read. WTF? We figured a tornado was coming, or maybe a nuclear attack.

In fact, the alert was to announce an 8 pm to 6 am curfew to help Philadelphia weather the wave of protest that has rocked American cities since we all saw the video of white cops slowly killing an unarmed black man in Minneapolis.

It was a racially diverse crowd of protesters in Philly, as it was in many other cities. Most of them were peaceful but a rowdy contingent was trashing shops and restaurants in Center City, a long way from my shack in the Tinicum swamp but close enough to be distressing.

“We’re screwed,” I said. “A lot of those stores were closed for months because of the COVID-19 lockdown. Now they’re being looted. The one-two punch could knock them out for good. The city might never recover.”

“Don’t blow your wig,” Swamp Rabbit replied. “It could be worse. There ain’t no shootin’ going on.”

The next day, Sunday, I dragged myself out of the swamp and biked uptown to see the damages. Walnut Street still smelled like smoke. Workers were sawing off chunks of plywood to seal up some of the trashed storefronts. Swamp Rabbit was right — no shootings, and the destruction could have been much worse.

But it wasn’t over. Later that day looters hit other retail spots, including the 52nd Street business strip in a mostly black neighborhood where renewal efforts have been going on for a long time. I told Swamp Rabbit that the looting of small businesses there was sickening.

“Not as sickening as them cops murdering George Floyd in broad daylight,” he said. “Or them white-collar looters using that stimulate package to steal billions that should go to poor peeps.”

“You mean stimulus package, rabbit, but never mind. Maybe these protests are the tipping point. When tempers cool, we can…”

My phone started squawking with red alert sounds; it was curfew time again.

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At times, history rhymes

Posted on June 2, 2020 by oddmanout215

trump bible

“When and if fascism comes to America it will not be labeled ‘made in Germany’; it will not be marked with a swastika; it will not even be called fascism; it will be called, of course, ‘Americanism.’”
Halford E. Luccock, 1938

The “how low can he go” question came up again yesterday. This time Dear Leader had the cops use tear gas to chase peaceful protesters so he could pose with a Bible for a photo op in front of St. John’s Episcopal Church, not far from the White House.

Swamp Rabbit was reading over my shoulder. “What’s up with the Bible?” he said. “Everybody knows Trump don’t read no holy books. He don’t even read them morning briefings from his cronies.”

“His base likes when he uses props — Bibles, flags, churches, whatever,” I explained. “It makes them feel all warm and hateful inside.”

“But that’s such an old trick,” Swamp Rabbit said. “You’d think the peeps would get sick of evil guys waving flags and Bibles by now.”

I shrugged. “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks, rabbit. Especially if the old tricks still work for him.”

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Why no editorials urging Trump to exit?

Posted on May 30, 2020 by oddmanout215

right thing 3

I think we will look back and ask why people weren’t more furious… Where was the outrage?
— Princeton University historian Julian Zelizer

I reminded Swamp Rabbit that all the mainstream news outlets are dropping the ball the same way: They constantly present evidence that Donald Trump is a danger to the country but refuse to call for what the evidence seems to demand — his resignation from office.

“That’s crazy talk,” Swamp Rabbit said. “Trump was impeached and didn’t resign. I’ll bet he don’t leave the White House even when he loses the election, not unless them palace guards drag him out.”

You’re missing the point, I told him. Of course Trump won’t resign, but it’s important for all democrats, small d, to go on record as having demanded he quit, because he has repeatedly demonstrated he isn’t fit to hold office.

“The election’s less than six months away,” Swamp Rabbit said. “Why not just wait and let the peeps decide?”

So I told him. For starters, Trump extorted a foreign power for personal gain, obstructed justice during the Mueller probe, and ignored the coronavirus pandemic until it was too late to prevent many thousands of avoidable deaths. With each passing week he becomes more dismissive of the laws and so-called norms that supposedly govern presidential behavior.

This week he took action to discourage Twitter from policing misinformation — his misinformation — on its site. Does anybody think he wouldn’t silence all those who challenge his lies if he thought he could get away with it?

“A lotta presidents did dirty deeds,” Swamp Rabbit countered. “Are you saying the media should have called on them all to resign?”

I reminded him that many major newspapers in the country called on Bill Clinton to resign when all he did was lie about a blowjob.

“But that was the old days, before the Internet started siphoning the regular media’s power and influence,” Swamp Rabbit said. “Most of them newspapers are dead or dying now. The survivors are scared they gonna lose what little pull they got left if they stand up to Trump in a big way. Why should they?”

“Because it might persuade some people to not vote for a would-be dictator,” I replied.

Swamp Rabbit groaned. “That’s really weak, Odd Man.”

“You’re right,” I admitted. “How about this — They should call on him to resign because it’s their job to speak truth to power, pardon the cliché. What good are they if they can’t do that?”

Update: Here’s Trump threatening street protesters (via Twitter, of course) following the killing of George Floyd by Minneapolis cops: “When the looting starts, the shooting starts.” As always, very presidential.

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Betting on a sure thing (covid-19)

Posted on May 22, 2020 by oddmanout215

covid

Swamp Rabbit’s parole officer Victor Cortez asked me if I wanted to bet against his bet that covid-19 deaths in the U.S. would hit 100,000 by Memorial Day. (The death count as of today was about 95,000.)

“That’s tasteless,” I said. “You are the ultimate degenerate gambler.”

He shrugged. “All the ballgames have been canceled because of the lockdown, so I’m betting on the virus. What else is there?”

I told him to bet on the stock market, investors are doing well now that they know the big corporations are being bailed out. The more workers get laid off, the better the market does. At least it seems that way.

“The stock market is a roller coaster,” Victor said, laughing behind his face mask. “Better to bet on death, it’s a sure thing.”

I tried to tell him he wasn’t in his right mind, none of us were. Unemployment might soon be as high as it was in the Depression. An orange hog monster is in the White House, doing a disastrous job of leading the country out of its worst public health crisis in a hundred years.

“You’re like most of us,” I said. “You feel adrift in unsafe waters, hoping to be rescued before the sharks get to you.”

He rolled his eyes. “Very poetic, but where’s Swamp Rabbit? I dropped by his shack but there’s nothing there but empty liquor bottles. Drinking is a parole violation in his case. I’ll bet he’s not wearing his face mask either.”

“Can you blame him?” I said. “The hog monster doesn’t wear a mask, and he’s supposed to be setting an example for the whole country.”

I told Victor to leave Swamp Rabbit alone. Take the day off. Watch a rerun of an old Super Bowl on ESPN.

He pulled his mask down to his chin. “You can’t bet money on a game that’s already been played.”

Then he said, “Are you sure you don’t want to bet on Memorial Day?”

Footnote: Back in April, a pro gambler in Nevada bet 10K that covid-19 would claim 100,000 victims by Sept. 1. It was his way of focusing the public’s attention on fighting the virus. Then he turned another 10K bet into a way to raise money for the homeless. Check it out.

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Channel surfing through lockdown

Posted on May 15, 2020 by oddmanout215

**FILE** SpongeBob SquarePants is shown in this handout provide

My neighbor Swamp Rabbit knocked on my door and let himself in when I didn’t open it.

“Why don’t you quit tweaking that thing?” he said, meaning the short story I was writing. “I bet you ain’t changed ten words in ten hours.”

I shrugged. “We’re in a lockdown. I’m sheltering in place. I’ve got all the time in the world.”

He turned on my TV, which he likes to watch when he’s hungover. Then he picked up the remote and got into a channel-surfing rhythm, pushing past cable news and a couple of miniseries on HBO. The sports channels were showing a very quiet game of baseball in South Korea (no fans in the ballpark because of social distancing rules) and a Phillies game from 1992.

I’m not a major fan of Bruce Springsteen, but I couldn’t help thinking of an oldie of his called “57 Channels (and Nothin’ On).”

“Why don’t you get your guitar and play that song you wrote about the COVID-19?” I said.

“I need my TV fix,” Swamp Rabbit replied. “If all else fails, there’s always some new show about Hitler. He ain’t never goin’ go out of style.”

“No politics,” I warned him. “No orange hog monster.”

Snippets of TV shows from another century appeared one after the other — “Gilligan’s Island,” “Perry Mason,” “Friends.” None of this stuff felt good for my eyes, not to mention my mental health.

After a while I told Swamp Rabbit to settle on something and he narrowed the options to three movies and a cartoon show. I read the titles and plot summaries on the TV screen.

Invasion U.S.A.: “Slavic mercenaries with bazookas hit Florida at Christmas, drawing an agent (Chuck Norris) out of retirement.”

Song of India: “A prince of the jungle (Sabu) frees beasts trapped by zoos for callous Indian royalty.”

X-Men: Dark Phoenix: “During a rescue mission, Jean Grey is hit by a cosmic force that makes her infinitely more powerful but far more unstable. The X-Men must unite to save her soul…”

SpongeBob SquarePants: “SpongeBob and Patrick must save Mr. Krabs when he gets trapped in the bank.”

“I’m gonna pass on them movies,” Swamp Rabbit said. “What about a psycho-killer biography or one of them shows about peeps in jail? You know, real lockdowns.”

He surfed past a few hundred more channels. The Hitler shows were all reruns. In the end he went with SpongeBob, for obvious reasons. (Cue up Springsteen video.)

Footnote: Actually, TCM is good sometimes, and there’s always Netflix.

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Don’t worry, it’s only a movie

Posted on May 8, 2020 by oddmanout215

last man2
Here they come, a squad of chubby Sandinistas wearing black surgical masks. Better cross the street. Oh no! A tall, skinny diva walking her tall, skinny dog. All I can see are her eyes, and they’re glaring at me. Better put on my mask and run in the street, at least until I get halfway back to my shack in the Tinicum swamp.

Easier said than done. On the block up ahead there’s a party going on with music playing and a Happy Birthday sign in the window of the corner house. None of the partiers are wearing masks, and they’re not in a social distancing mood. They’re teenagers. Probably more worried about running out of beer than catching the plague.

So I stay in the street and run harder and put my mask on whenever someone gets too close. And after awhile there are no pedestrians and I feel like I’m in a movie playing the sole survivor of an attack by aliens that left all the buildings intact. That’s it, I’ll pretend it’s a movie.

Barnes & Noble is closed. The restaurants have shut down and the schools and gyms and arenas and retail stores and bars and theaters and coffee shops. It’s not as if everyone just took a few days off and will return next week. Some of the storefront windows are boarded up.

When I get back to the shack, Swamp Rabbit shows me an article from the Philadelphia Inquirer:

… It’s already clear that our habits have been profoundly altered after just a few weeks of home confinement. Many people have grown comfortable working in their dens and basements and having life’s necessities brought to their doorsteps. The longer the closures go on, the more likely that Center City’s struggling retailers will finally succumb to the delivery economy.

The rabbit is rattled. He downs a shot of whiskey and says, “What if them office workers you dissed last week don’t come back? What if everybody starts living indoors all the time? If Center City dies, what happens to us peeps in the boondocks?”

I shrug. “In the boonies we’ll live like second-class citizens, same as before, except the taxes will be a lot higher. Uptown, the office workers will return, at least for awhile. Center City will make a modest comeback when the infection rate falls to near zero.”

“Yeah, but what happens if there’s a second wave of virus, and a third, like with that flu back in 1918?”

“Have another drink,” I said. “You don’t even want to think about that.”

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The loneliness of the long-distance office worker

Posted on April 29, 2020 by oddmanout215

We took turns reading a Philadelphia Inquirer story about possible psychological damage suffered by office workers who, for their own safety’s sake, must work at home for as long as the COVID-19 disaster persists.

In suddenly empty offices all across America, idle water coolers stand as memorials to a workplace culture that has virtually disappeared during the coronavirus epidemic.

For millions now forced to labor at home, the casual collegiality symbolized by those gurgling office gathering spots has given way to seclusion and uncertainty, possibly exacerbating what ex-Surgeon General Vivek Murthy has called ‘America’s epidemic of loneliness.’

Swamp Rabbit shook his head. “Them poor water coolers. I’ll bet they ain’t gurgled in weeks.”

I pretended to smack him upside his head. “It’s not funny, dude. Forced solitude is taking a toll on our mental health. Where would we be without the casual collegiality of the office workplace?”

He raised his mangy head and looked me over. “You’re putting me on, Odd Man. You don’t like office work.”

I failed to suppress a laugh. “Let me put it this way. I never worked an office job that didn’t make me feel like I was trapped with people who, with very few exceptions, weren’t scheming backstabbers or hopeless drones.”

“They probably felt the same way about you,” Swamp Rabbit said. “You ain’t exactly fun to be around.”

“That’s my point, rabbit. Why should office workers have to put up with each other? We’re talking mostly about bullshit jobs — writing ad copy, public relations and so on. Why not just use the Internet to do the work from home?”

“I don’t know, Odd Man, it can get pretty lonely at home.”

“You mean lonely like the loneliness of the long-distance runner? It’s a lot worse being lonely in a crowd of dead-ass office workers.”

We’re reading a bullshit newspaper story about bullshit grievances, I told him. These people are getting paid to work from home and therefore have little to complain about, especially compared to essential workers who get paid next to nothing to risk infection every day.

Swamp Rabbit told me to calm down, he agreed with me, but why did the Inquirer run a story that tries to make us feel sorry for at-home office workers?

“Because office workers are their audience,” I said. “Who else would have the time or inclination to read such crap?”

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Disinfecting the disaffected

Posted on April 24, 2020 by oddmanout215

I wanted to raise a glass Wednesday to the 50th anniversary of Earth Day, but Swamp Rabbit only wanted to lament the ironies of the occasion:

• The Earth Day anniversary calls for a big celebration, but it’s not happening because the coronavirus pandemic has made getting together in crowds too dangerous.

• The air in this country is a lot cleaner this month, but only because so many cars are off the road and so many businesses closed due to virus-related quarantines. And the orange hog monster in the White House just took action to lower fuel economy standards for automobiles, so don’t count on cleaner air in the long run.

• Wild animals are roaming some city streets, but (again) only because of street-clearing quarantines. Don’t count on wildlife to make a comeback anytime soon. Count on global warming and human overpopulation to push wildlife into smaller and smaller confines. And count on human encroachment to cause more viral pandemics.

“Enough of your cheap ironies,” I said. “Give some credit to the visionaries who created Earth Day. They were in the vanguard of all efforts to stop polluting the planet.”

Swamp Rabbit shook his head. “If you think most peeps are serious about stopping pollution, then you probably think hydroxychloroquine cures virus victims.”

“Don’t be a defeatist,” I said. “Most people create a whole lot more dirt than they clean up, but that doesn’t mean they don’t want to save the planet. They just haven’t made the right changes yet.”

I mentioned the slow transition to renewable energy that’s underway all over the world. Coal will be dead soon. Fracking companies are losing money. Even blowhards like financial analyst Jim Cramer are talking like environmentalists.

Swamp Rabbit wasn’t convinced. He reminded me that Congress is still subsidizing the dirt bags who make dirty fuel, and that the disaffected masses in the MAGA coalition are still following the hog monster’s advice.

“I don’t know about that, rabbit. He just suggested that mainlining disinfectant might be another good treatment for the virus.”

“OK, they won’t follow him on that,” Swamp Rabbit conceded. “But they’d be happy if the Democrats did.”

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