Who's this Tony Morrison guy? Snooki and Rutgers students want to know.
What’s worth more? A commencement speech by a Nobel-winning novelist? Or a pair of Q&A sessions with one of reality television’s biggest stars? At Rutgers University, Snooki edges out Toni Morrison by a couple thousand dollars. Last month, Rutgers officials said they had booked Morrison — author of “Beloved,” “Song of Solomon” and other novels — to speak… at commencement in May. She will be paid $30,000… Rutgers students said they had also made a big-name booking. Snooki… appeared at two question-and-answer sessions at the Livingston Student Center in Piscataway. Her fee: $32,000.
An nj.com reader’s posted response to the story:
When asked what her advice was for Rutgers students, [Snooki] said: “Study hard, but party harder.” Great advice. No wonder today’s college graduates can barely spell.
A reply to the reader that I drafted for Snooki, in response to the nj.com reader:
Here’s one word I can spell — L-O-O-S-E-R! You’re just jealous because everybody likes me, ’cause I go through the boyfriend break-ups and the friend stuff and the fights and stuff like that, and ’cause I’m like, relate-able, even though I don’t sing or any of that stuff. You want to know why I’m relate-able? It’s because I say what’s on my mind, which is nothing, and most people can relate ’cause they’ve got nothing on their minds, and nothing relates to nothing, if you know what I mean. And what’s it to you that Rutgers college paid me more than this Tony Morrison guy that writes books that nobody reads? Do they even make books these days except for loosers like you? If this Morrison guy is so smart, how come his agent only got him 30K? It’s ’cause I’m relate-able and he’s not, end of story.
Odd Man Out 
For a second there, I though the reply to the reader was actually from Snooki. I could not believe she did not know who Morrison is, then again, maybe I could since all she does is party.
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nicole, you are delusional and unrelate-able. I am glad you are able to admit how empty headed you are. I am shocked that you are capable of drawing a breath let alone form a thought. If this is a publicity stunt it’s not a good one. Once Jersey Shore fades away so will you. Bask in your fame while you can because your 15 minutes of fame is coming to a close. A joke has an expiration date too. You are an insult to human intelligence along with your waste of sperm cast mates. Your mothers should have swallowed instead of giving birth. You and your cast mates are irrelevent. Your fame is proof that we are a nation of baffoons that enjoy watching morons publicly humiliate themselves on a seasonal basis. No wonder the rest of the world hates us. it’s because a small segment of our society emulates stupidity. You really need to take your head out of your goblin ass and think before you speak. Toni (who is a female by the way) is more relevent than you and has contributed her talent(which you have none of) to the world. Your retort is a furthering of your ignorance and so unappealing. The reason you have a tough time finding a boyfriend is obvious. You lack appeal, both in your appearance and personality. I would’nt bang you with Mikes bitch pecker. I am surprised Elvira has sued you for stealing her look. You are a mutated, goblin version of her, just shorter. I am done for now. Have your poor excuse of an agent write your retorts for now on. You have truely shown your level of intelligence. Nonexistant.
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oops, I just realized that THAT might not be Nicole. But I meant everything I said. Damn I feel stupid.
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